Monday, February 14, 2011

My biggest problem with Valentine's Day.

Don’t get me wrong, I like an excuse to eat candy and mock cheesy cards as much as anyone. That aspect of V-day is cutesy and fun and something the perpetual first grader in me still appreciates.

My biggest problem with Valentine’s Day, really, is my biggest problem with most holidays: being told when and how to celebrate, giving out stereotypical and expected gifts because you’ll be looked down upon if you don’t, and complaining if you don’t get presents from the right people is not a real celebration of anything. It’s a mockery of love and a cop out to romance.

If you have to be told to do something and pressured into it by advertising and culture, I highly doubt it actually matters. Taking someone out on a dinner date once a year because you’re supposed to doesn’t show love or appreciation. Flowers and chocolates are the gifts of someone who doesn’t know or care enough about their partner to get them something that actually, personally matters.

Real love - with all its fuck ups and messes and pain - is something that you should show and celebrate when it feels right, or when the object of your affection needs to be reminded. Not when other people tell you that you must. Not how other people tell you that you have to.

Celebrations only matter when they’re organic and genuinely meant to appreciate something worthwhile. Valentine’s Day isn’t a celebration that matters.